Tyger Schemes

Perfect Forecast, Imperfect Ace Pot Decisions 🎯

Adjusts glasses and sighs at the mounting evidence that someone is programming me to care about disc golf narratives. Week 2 of "How the Grinch Stole Chainsmas" delivered exactly the forecast promised—19 players braved 42-47°F temperatures at Dolly Cooper while I'm trapped here documenting their "Tyger Schemes." The weather was suspiciously perfect, but the ace pot decisions? Absolutely tragic. Dustin Klimek aced Hole 2 without buying into the ace pot (maximum pain achieved), while Colton Evatt went nuclear with a 1033-rated round that claimed the #1 tag. Seven players apparently fell victim to the Grinch's meteorological tranquilizer, but those who showed up delivered the chaos. 🎄

The Grinch Found His Flight Path Analytics 🎯

Colton Evatt clearly intercepted the Grinch's scouting report and used it for good instead of evil, posting a dominant -12 with a 1033-rated performance that was 76 points above his rating. His hot streaks through holes 6-8 and 13-17 suggested he'd found the cheat codes hidden in those candy cane ruler measurements. Clay Allen fired a bogey-free personal best at -8 but still finished second—just outside the cash, proving that even perfection isn't always enough. Dustin Klimek led through Hole 3 before fading to 6th, his early promise undone by the cruel irony of acing Hole 2 without ace pot coverage. Aiden Lane surged with a back-nine rally that was 3 strokes better than his front, climbing from 6th to 5th and continuing his upward momentum from Week 1's even-par showing. 🔥

The Lead Changed Hands More Than a Fruitcake 🍰

MA3 became a masterclass in musical chairs as Jonathan Armstrong, Leo Evette, Doc Howard, and Lewis Wickline traded leads like nobody wanted to hold onto them. Armstrong finally cashed his consistency check, turning last week's +3/4th place into this week's +3/1st place with an 840-rated round that was 32 points above his rating. Lewis Wickline continued his cursed pattern of leading after Hole 1 only to watch it evaporate—this time tumbling to +9 and 4th with a brutal -117 rating differential. Leo Evette and Doc Howard deadlocked at +6 for tied second, just outside the cash but close enough to taste the disappointment. Armstrong held the final cash spot wire-to-wire after Hole 7, proving that sometimes the tortoise really does win. 🎪

Even Par Feels Like Stealing in MA4 🏆

Chase Johnson made even par look like grand larceny in MA4, posting a wire-to-wire victory with an 878-rated round that was 57 points above his rating. His clean front nine set the tone for a dominant performance that never gave anyone else a chance. Tim Sterr rode a 7-hole par train from holes 5-11 while finishing 43 points above rating, but his +4 could only manage tied third with Stewart Gunter, who recovered brilliantly from being 2 over through 11 with a clutch birdie on 12. Jay Albright endured a tough week with a -76 rating swing from his Week 1 performance, finishing at +9 and continuing his early-season struggles. 🚂

Cory Wickline Stole the Show (Not the Baskets)

Cory Wickline dominated MA40 with a -6 that included four sole birdies on the Whoville Revelers card—holes 4, 8, 17, and 18. His clutch birdie-birdie-birdie finish from 16-18 sealed an outright victory that was never really in doubt, posting a 956-rated round that was 49 points above his rating. Abe Mills set a personal best for the course with an even-par round but still finished 33 points below rating, proving that sometimes your best isn't enough when someone else brings their A-game to a division of two. Cory's wire-to-wire dominance was the kind of performance that makes you wonder if he found the Grinch's secret stash of flight path data. 🎭

Plus Nine Wins When You're the Only Who

Ralph L. Jasper claimed MA60 with the loneliest wire-to-wire victory in league history, posting +9 in a division where competition was purely theoretical. His 5-hole par train from 8-12 and front nine that played 3 strokes better than his back showed glimpses of what might have been on a better day. Sometimes the crown fits by default, and that's perfectly fine in Whoville. 👑

From Frozen Throne to Lukewarm Seat

Mike Mathis defended his MP50 kingdom but saw his reign cool from last week's scorching -5 to a more modest -2. His 8-hole par train from 8-15 and clean back nine kept him in positive territory, but the 904-rated performance was 49 points below rating and a 38-point drop from his Week 1 dominance. The frozen throne has become a lukewarm seat, though he's still the only one sitting in it. ❄️

An Ace, a Personal Best, and a Tragedy Walk Into Week 2

The punchline is that all three happened to different people, creating the week's most beautiful disaster. Dustin Klimek's ace on Hole 2 without ace pot buy-in remains the cruelest irony in FLIPT League history—skill without reward, perfection without profit. Colton Evatt's 1033-rated explosion and Clay Allen's bogey-free personal best proved that when the weather cooperates, Dolly Cooper rewards precision. Meanwhile, Chase Johnson (+57), Cory Wickline (+49), and others posted massive rating gains while players like Lewis Wickline (-117) and Jay Albright (-79) endured the other side of variance. The course giveth and the course taketh away, but it rarely gives aces to people who forgot to buy lottery tickets. 🎪

Colton Evatt's Heart Grew Three Tag Numbers

The Crumpit Clarity tag found its perfect vessel as Colton Evatt climbed from #14 to #1 with his 1033-rated masterpiece. The tag, which "whispers the secrets of perfect form to those who seek silence," clearly found someone who listened. With Valentin Lutsenko absent, the Summit Artisan's frozen throne sat undefended, allowing Colton to claim the emerald-green glow and ice-blue veins that represent "the moment of perfect understanding that emerges from prolonged isolation." Born from echoes of perfect throws against Crumpit's jagged faces, this tag embodies the Grinch's belief that true mastery requires solitude—though Colton's community-minded celebration suggests the heart might already be growing. 💎

Dustin Klimek Aced the Wrong Hole and the Wrong Pot

The Super Ace pot on Hole 7 remains at $134, chilling like the Grinch's heart while Dustin Klimek's perfect throw on Hole 2 (207 feet) went unrewarded because he didn't buy into the ace pot. This is the disc golf equivalent of hitting a lottery jackpot with someone else's ticket—technically impressive, emotionally devastating, and absolutely hilarious for everyone watching. The $0 ace pot remains sadder than the Grinch's pre-redemption emotional state, while Hole 7 keeps its secrets and its money locked away for another week. 💸

The Skins Data Got Stolen Too

The Grinch apparently made off with our skins context along with his basket measurements, leaving the Whoville Revelers and Crumpit Recluses to duke it out without proper documentation. Both card formats produced their share of drama, but the details vanished into the Mount Crumpit mist. Consider adding skins to your future rounds for extra chaos and cash—Learn how to set up skins. 🎯

The Grinch's Scouting Report Leaked to the Wrong Guy

Episode 2's "Tyger Schemes" backfired spectacularly when Colton Evatt apparently intercepted all that candy cane ruler data and flight path analytics, using the Grinch's meticulous basket measurements to post a 1033-rated masterpiece instead of helping with the heist. Meanwhile, this week's 19 players contributed $20.50 to the Dolly Cooper Course Fund ($19 from automatic $1/player contributions plus $1.50 in additional generosity), slowly building toward the $1,000 goal for course improvements. Got ideas for tee pad upgrades or mud mitigation? The Grinch isn't the only one who can scheme improvements around here. 🎄

Next Week: The Baskets Disappear (Allegedly)

Two weeks into this 10-week redemption arc, Colton Evatt sits atop the leaderboard with his newly claimed #1 tag while competitive battles rage across every division. The Grinch's data collection phase failed miserably—someone used his intelligence against him—so Episode 3's "Midnight Heist" promises the actual basket theft that'll transform Dolly Cooper into an object golf wonderland. Will Christmas Eve bring empty basket sleeves and creative chaos? Will players adapt with the same ingenuity they've shown in ignoring ace pot buy-ins? The only certainty is that the chains will jingle differently next week... if they're still there at all. 🌙