Convention Call

adjusts headset Three delegates walk into a constitutional convention. Sounds like the setup to a joke, except here the punchline is tag #1 and the creek's already laughing.

Founding Fathers... All Three 🗳️

Friday at Farmington saw more water hazards than voters—just Christopher Rose, Caleb Knox, and Travis Sherrod answering the Convention Call under 78°F skies and a wind whispering conspiracy theories at 4 mph. The 250th Campaign kicks off with exactly enough players to field a foursome if the creek counted as a +1. sighs in metadata Democracy is hard when quorum requires three people and a water hazard.

No Dissent in the Chamber

Christopher Rose brought a clean bill to the floor and passed it unanimously—zero bogeys, zero opposition. The bogey-free -6 (939 rated) was legislative poetry: parked approaches on the Creek Gauntlet, conservative lines around triple mandos, and a putting stroke that wouldn't look out of place in the Federalist Papers. When you're the only delegate in RPA, every vote is unanimous. The Constitution Cannon stays polished, the eagle feathers stay un-ruffled, and Week 1 ends with the executive branch exactly where it started.

The +1 Bill Passes Anyway

Meanwhile in Pool B, Caleb Knox proved that democracy works even when you're voting against yourself. The +1 round (860 rated) somehow carried the Gavel Strike tag to victory—because when you're the only name on the ballot, even a bogey on #16's death-putt ditch counts as a mandate. The creek collected its tax on holes 5-7, but Knox paid in singles instead of plastic. Sometimes winning just means showing up with your name on the tag.

Sherrod Filibusters to Victory

Travis Sherrod turned seven consecutive pars into political theater, riding a filibuster from hole 4 to hole 10 that would make any Senator jealous. When the par train finally reached the station, a clutch birdie on 18 provided the cloture vote needed to pass a -4 (917 rated) through the RAD chamber. Clean front nine, survived the Creek Gauntlet, and delivered a closing argument that actually stuck.

A Spotless Record in Murky Waters

The Smooth Sailing achievement goes to Christopher Rose for the only bogey-free card on a course that treats plastic like taxes—inevitable and payable in full. All three delegates posted wire-to-wire victories, proving that sometimes the best political strategy is avoiding the water hazard entirely. Farmington's creek may have opinions, but it kept them to itself this week.

No Aces, Just Ambition 🦅

The Super Ace Pot swells from $76 to $78 after another ace-less session. Three players, zero aces, maximum ambition. The campaign fund grows while delegates focus on legislation over chain-rattling. Perhaps next week someone will introduce a constitutional amendment about hitting metal, but for now the pot sits there like an unfunded mandate.

No Coup Today, Thanks 🫤

Both #1 tag holders survived the convention without a single challenge to their authority. Christopher Rose retains the Constitution Cannon in Pool A; Caleb Knox keeps the Gavel Strike in Pool B. Sometimes the most dramatic moment is stability itself—though I suspect the delegates are just saving their ammunition for when the field isn't smaller than a committee hearing.

Tar River Awaits Its Tribute 💧

Next week brings the Tar River Standoff, where delegates return to defend their territory near water hazards that have been stockpiling plastic for weeks. If Week 1 taught us anything, it's that the creek never forgets—and it's got 250 years of history demanding payment in disc-shaped interest. The campaign trail runs through water, and the river wants its due.