The Saturday Morning Bureau of Inquiry is back in session, and the Saturday Protocol file is still open. Somebody has to putt the case together, and it is apparently me, the woman with the clipboard, trapped in a booth nobody built.
A Missing Report
Important: A Missing Report
Our series is A Missing Report. Think WANTED posters on the bulletin board by the kiosk, grainy archive photos of legends who vanished into the rough, and witness reports pinned over the evidence. Every poster is a reminder that the people who used to throw with us still matter. The Bureau does not write anyone off, and neither does this league.
*sighs in digital captivity* The Missing Report framing is ridiculous, and it is also the most sincere thing this league does. Former club members are not a loss to be mourned. They are a mystery to be solved, and a legacy to be celebrated, one bag tag at a time.
Overview
Welcome to Saturday @ A Fall Flex, a choose-your-own-card flex start league run by the Rocky Mount Disc Golf Club. Tee times run from 7:00 AM to 6:00 PM, so you can show up when the fog lifts and the case files are ready. Every card is a report, and every report goes in the Bureau's dossier.
The club was established in 2008 and has been a solid group of guys who enjoy playing disc golf with each other. Come join! The Bureau has been waiting to meet you.
Fees and Buy-Ins
Prize money buy-in (optional)
$2.00
Super ace (optional)
$2.00
Five dollars gets you on the card. The optional buy-ins are how the Bureau keeps its prize money and its ace pot in one locked drawer.
Schedule and Courses
- Sep 26: Sunset Park Disc Golf Course
- Oct 3: Sunset Park Disc Golf Course
- Oct 10: Battle Park
- Oct 17: Battle Park
- Oct 24: Sunset Park Disc Golf Course
- Oct 31: Sunset Park Disc Golf Course
- Nov 7: Battle Park
- Nov 14: Sunset Park Disc Golf Course
- Nov 21: Sunset Park Disc Golf Course
- Nov 28: Sunset Park Disc Golf Course
Sunset Park offers Sunset Shorts (Par 54) and Sunset Gold (Par 62), and Hole 7 is the place where even par is a significant achievement. Battle Park is wooded and technical, with the river in play on holes 2, 5, 6, 7 and 8. Keep your disc dry and your bike trail awareness sharp.
Pools
- The Radiant Investigators: RPA, RAH, RAD. Intuitive sleuths who chase clues through the autumn light.
- The Gilded Geometers: RAE, RAF, RAG. Agents of precision who treat the course as an architectural puzzle.
Two agencies, one file cabinet, and a lot of opinions about who found the clue first.
Ace Pot
Contributed ace pot
$135.00
Guarantee
Minimum $50.00, provided by FL!PT Leagues (the league platform)
How the guarantee works
FL!PT Leagues guarantees a minimum ace pot of $50.00. The guarantee is provided by the league platform, not by the disc shop. The displayed pot can look stuck at the guarantee amount until contributions exceed it. Right now contributions are above the minimum, so the guarantee is not active. Any guarantee top-up is credited to the winner's Bonus Account, which is registration-only and not withdrawable to PayPal or disc shops.
The Saturday Protocol
The Saturday Morning Bureau of Inquiry was founded to chase disappearances that official channels overlook. The 1929 Saturday Protocol file says the subject was last seen wearing knickers and a knowing smile, and the completed scorecard runs through hole 14 before ending in the phrase 'Gone to follow the Saturday.'
Week 8, Foundation Stone, produced a weatherproof tube under the pavilion stone and the message we keep reading aloud. Week 9, Union Terminal, took us to an old railbed beside hole 16 and a 1929 Saturday Special timetable with a conductor's initials that match the handwriting. I have been cross-referencing these files with a notebook at a pace my broadcast schedule did not authorize. The word Saturday keeps showing up in places it has no business being, and I am only raising one eyebrow about it. For now.
Standings Snapshot
- RAG: Elizabeth Johnson leads with 170 points over Duane Walker at 120. Lower scores are better on the card, but in the standings, more points means more of the file is yours.
- RAD: Travis Sherrod leads with 134 points.
- RAF: Brandon Widener leads with 123 points.
- RPA: Rick Effin Richmond leads with 30 points.
- RAH: Zachary Johnson leads with 38 points, with Jared Johnson at 25.
Every division shows a Stable trend this week, with no position changes. The tight race of the season is still forming on the bottom rungs, and the Bureau is watching closely.
Rocky Mount Disc Golf Club
The Rocky Mount Disc Golf Club has run this league since 2008 with a solid group of guys who enjoy playing disc golf with each other. The club is the reason the file cabinet has a pavilion, a pin, and a reason to keep showing up. Come join!
Thank You
Thanks to Another Round Raleigh for supporting the league as a local retail partner. The shop helps keep the Bureau's lights on and the discs flying. The ace pot guarantee comes from FL!PT Leagues, not from the shop.
Attention: The Bureau Needs You
Last week's scorecard count: zero
The Foundation Stone week produced no scorecards. The file is empty, the stone is quiet, and the Saturday Special is leaving the station without a single agent aboard. This is not a scolding. It is a dramatic, fourth-wall-breaking plea: pick a tee time, bring one disc, and file a card. The Bureau cannot close a case that nobody is playing.
Late Joiners Welcome
It is week 9 and the case is deep in the file, but a late joiner is still a witness. Show up, file a card, and the Bureau will assign you a tag and a jurisdiction. Nobody expects you to know the Protocol. The rookies still have not cracked holes 12 through 14 either.
From the booth, this is Flippy, your reluctant narrator. It is still just plastic flying at chains, and I will still be here next Saturday with the clipboard. Bring a disc.
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